It broken — time to fix it

USA trounced in Ryder Cup again;
changes must be made before '08

WINDERMERE — Another Ryder Cup is history, and another loss has been chalked up for the United States.

That’s three victories in a row for Europe, and five of the last six.

Clearly, something is broken, so here are five quick solutions to improve the Americans’ chances at Valhalla Golf Club in Louisville, Ky., Sept. 19-21, 2008:

• Lose the baggage I: Not sure when the tradition of making significant others a part of the team started, but it has to stop immediately.

Wives are great — every man should have one — but their sole role at the Ryder Cup is to be the strong woman behind the man.

Have you ever seen wives and girlfriends jumping on the pile after a team wins the World Series? No. Do significant others wear matching “uniforms” at an NFL game? No. Do NBA organizations allow wives and girlfriends to travel on the team plane? Rarely, if ever. Do significant others march into an Olympic stadium during the opening ceremonies? Never.

There were reports last week that the wives were in the USA’s team room when captain Tom Lehman was addressing the troops. Has Bill Belichick ever invited the girls into the Super Bowl locker room? Yeah, right . . .

Fast-forward to Valhalla: “Here are your tickets for the week, Mrs. Woods; thank you for coming. Have fun, but please remain outside the ropes.”

(And to show I’m not sexist, there shall be no uniformed PGA of America officials walking the fairways, either.)

• Lose the baggage II: Last week, the Americans’ plane was three hours late in arriving — because they couldn’t get all the luggage on board! Do we really need different outfits for every session? Do we need those hideous plaid and tweed traveling get-ups? What about formal attire for the gala and suits for the opening festivities? Scrap them all.

The rule for 2008? One man, one suitcase.

• Motivate Mickelson: If Phil Mickelson wants to “shut it down” after the PGA Championship every year, then he should give up his spot on the team and go to the beach. In the last two Ryder Cups he’s 1-7-1; in the last two Presidents Cups he’s 3-5-2 — that’s an abysmal 4-12-3 record, totally unacceptable for someone annually ranked in the top three in the world. In 2008, Mickelson needs to play his way into shape prior to the event — assuming he isn’t fully retired by that point.

• Put on game faces: On the day the captain fills out his team in 2008, all members must stop shaving. Nothing brings a hockey team together for the Stanley Cup playoffs like a bunch of unkempt, scraggly guys in the locker room. The “playoff beard” works to bind a squad. It’s about attitude.

• Wild-card picks, not captain’s selections: WhoMever gets the job as U.S. Ryder Cup captain for 2008 must review the process by which he makes his two selections. It’s time to start finding the right players, not the best players. Forget the rankings and the rules, and pick somebody who’ll scare the Europeans — like John Daly, who has never played in a Ryder Cup. Then the captain must commit to his choices and play them. Scott Verplank was undefeated and untied this year, but sat out three sessions.

Barbaro update: Good story in Sentinel

Orlando newspaper does fine job
with feature story on Derby winner

WINDERMERE — In a sea of ink spilled about football, football and more football, the Orlando Sentinel's sports editors found a page for Andrew Carter's fine feature story on Barbaro this morning.

If you, like me, are rooting for the horse, you'll enjoy this piece: click here.

(You might have to register for the Sentinel's Web site, but it's free, and they don't bombard you with spam ...)

For daily updates on Barbaro, check out: TimWoolleyRacing.com.

And a new program has started to find "Barbaro Ambassadors" and raise funds for equine-injury research: CampaigningForBarbaro.com.

New section added: 'What I'm Reading'

Offering a real insiders view
of my coffee table, nightstand

WINDERMERE — Over there, on the right hand side of this page, you'll see a new section: "What I'm Reading."

I've always said the best ways to learn something about a man is to 1) play a round of golf with him, and 2) find out what he's reading.

Since golf takes nearly six hours — in Orlando the game can be worse than a trip to the dentist — it's easier to get to know me by the books scattered around the house:

• "Casino Royale," by Ian Fleming (1953). This novel introduced James Bond to the world, and has been made into a feature film, which will be released Nov. 17. (All the students in one of my classes are reading this with me, and we'll go see the movie as a group.)

• "The Tender Bar," by J.R. Moehringer (2005). On loan from my good friend Adam Barr — who is as erudite as they come — this memoir is touching and entertaining. At one chapter a night, I'll be done in a couple weeks.

• "The Dante Club," by Matthew Pearl (2003). I judged this book by its cover ... it was an airport impulse buy. The artwork reminded me of Caleb Carr's novels "The Alienist" and "The Angel of Darkness," two 19th Century period pieces that I loved. "The Dante Club" is on the nightstand until I finish "The Tender Bar."

• "Wild at Heart," by John Eldredge (2001). Studying this book, along with its "field manual," for my Tuesday morning men's group. Subtitled "Discovering the Secret of a Man's Soul," it leads us on our quest for a battle to fight, a beauty to rescue and an adventure to live. We'll be going on a Colorado retreat led by Eldredge in February.

USA 3rd in world golf race

As Ryder Cup approaches,
Americans must face reality

WINDERMERE — Sorry to have to report this, my fellow Americans, but our once unassailable advantage in golf has disappeared. The USA is now a third-world power.

Next week 12 Americans will tee it up against 12 Europeans in the Ryder Cup Matches, and the Euros are a statistically stronger squad.

Team USA players have an average berth of 28.17 in the Official World Golf Ranking, while the Europeans average 23.58. Our boys rank from Tiger Woods (No. 1) to Brett Wetterich (No. 65); Team Europe ranges from Sergio Garcia (No. 8) to Paul McGinley (No. 52). We have three players ranked lower than the Irishman.

And it's not surprising that non-Ryder Cup eligible players are the best of the bunch. The top 12 so-called Internationals, who compete against the United States in the Presidents Cup, have an average ranking of 16.08, ranging from Fiji's Vijay Singh (No. 4) to Australia's Nick O'Hern (No. 30).

The Southern Hemisphere has taken the lead in men's golf.

It's time for the PGA Tour to concede that point and allow the PGA of America's Ryder Cup to be the game's major team event. The winner of next week's matches should play the Internationals next year and start an annual competition, but that means the USA could be left outside the ropes.

Given the weakness of our team, that's where we belong.

Tribe should trade Triple-A teams

Yankees want out of Columbus,
so give them Buffalo right now

WINDERMERE — Read a story today that the New York Yankees want to end their 28-year relationship with the Columbus Clippers. If that's the case, the Dolans need to pull every possible trick in the law book to grab that AAA International League market.

I don't know what the Indians' contract is with the Buffalo Bisons, but I'm sure officials there would love a chance to land the Yankees.

Columbus could be a great market for Indians-ticket sales, and the Clippers will play in a new ballpark in 2008. Buffalo is 190 miles from Cleveland, Columbus 120 — an hour closer even for the pokiest driver.

Plus, there's an intangible benefit when your top prospects are just a limo ride away (Akron and Columbus) — the lazy fat-cats on the MLB roster have to keep looking over their shoulder.

Make the deal, Larry. Fast.

'Hollywoodland' & 'Little Miss Sunshine'

Saw 2 new films in 2 nights,
thanks to return of the Aussies

WINDERMERE — The Australians are back in town, and that means cinema revenues are spiking.

Sarah-Jane Kenyon, the LPGA Tour and Futures Tour player who stays with us, and her boyfriend/caddie Duane Smith are spending a few days here before heading to San Francisco for the Longs Drugs Challenge and then on to Queensland.

Sarah and Duane are bigger film freaks than I am, if that's possible, so we've been hitting the multiplex hard.

Last night it was "Little Miss Sunshine," a quirky road movie that was hilarious.

Monday we checked out "Hollywoodland," which had a "Chinatown"/"L.A. Confidential" sort of feel.

I highly recommend both.

Next on the agenda? Maybe "Kiss Kiss Bang Bang" on DVD.

No football tradition left in Cleveland

Another Browns' season starts,
another loss dampens all hope

WINDERMERE — Once upon a time there was a real tradition of winning football in Cleveland, but, sadly, it is as long gone as leather helmets and the drop kick.

The reality remaining is one of horrible play by the Browns and little hope for the fans.

Try these stats on for size:

* Since returning to the NFL in 1999, the Browns are 1-7 in season openers, and this despite the league's generosity in letting them start at home all eight years.

* Go back five more seasons, to the "Bellicose" Bill Belichick era, and the team is 3-10 in season openers (and 3-10 in home openers).

Football is alone among team sports in that the season opener really sets the tone for the whole year. If you watched that abomination against the New Orleans Saints yesterday, you saw a team that was out-manned, out-executed, out-hustled and out-coached. There was little on display to suggest that the Browns will beat anybody this season.

Why is this so? Bad coaching.

There are 18 men employed as "coaches" on this team, one for every three players on the 53-man roster!! And that's the best game-plan that they could formulate -- let our less-than-mediocre quarterback run around willy-nilly, and hope someone can catch a pass?

There have been 14 head coaches in this franchise's history, and only one, Nick Skorich (1971-74), had ever been an NFL head coach before being hired.

The on-the-job-training method hasn't worked since Paul Brown and Blanton Collier (last world championship, in 1964 — 41-plus years!).

It's time for a change! We want Jim Tressel!! (Oops, he's never been an NFL head coach ... We want Sam Rutigliano!!)